Adieu to the Lion
07.6.2013
He is old and tired. His right leg drags behind him. His bony skeleton shows pink through the white fur. It is hard for him to jump on the bed or onto a chair beside us.
In May and June, I traveled for a month in the USA, and coming home, wept on seeing our little lion so weak, so sick. You can see it in his eyes, his fur, his slow movement. He has a tumor, inoperable because of his age, and we grind six medications a day into his food. He is 19.
Street art by Miss-Tic (c) 2013
Richard and I lie on the living room floor, and sing to him. We bring his small statue of Bastet out of her basket, and she blesses him. Marley’s voice is a peep now instead of a roar.
Macho cat, King of the Block, calm, afraid of nothing, no one, resourceful (he adopted us after interviewing everyone on the block), confident, outspoken. He was Richard’s muse and mine, he gave us equal time. He was the familiar of our writing group for six or seven years.
He was seriously pissed at us twice, and both involved moves. Once when we moved from Venice, California a few miles to Playa del Rey. There were so many feral cats in the neighborhood, and he came home beaten up and bitten (and turned into a Cone-head for a few months) that we had to keep him indoors after his years of roaming Venice. (How would you feel? Exactly.) But he did have a sunny inner courtyard all his own in the center of our Spanish-style house.
And then on moving to Paris, because he was ONE pound over the weight limit and so could not ride with us upfront, he was banished into cargo limbo for the plane trip. He hissed at us like a cobra when we picked him up in the fret section of Charles de Gaulle airport. Fret? We did. And later learned it meant freight. He wouldn’t look at us the whole taxi ride into town.
And then he became a Parisian chat. He learned to modulate his voice, not to be yelling all the time like an American. To trim down. (A friend, Frederic Tuten, tells us that when he lived in Paris, someone told him the only serious crime here is being fat).
Marley learned to be a flâneur. He disguised himself as a fur scarf, and strolled around Paris on Richard’s shoulders, as cool and leisurely as any Parisian cat.
Street art (c) 2013 by C215
In all essential ways, though, he did not change on moving to Paris. He still loved being as close to us as he could get. Either one of us would do, but both of us? Purr-fect.
He was still psychic. When friends Mort and Jeannette were last here, visiting from their houseboat, he sensed Jeannette’s grief at losing their sailor chat, Miranda. In a room full of a dozen people, he stayed close to her, wove around her ankles, comforting her, and who knows, maybe even speaking to Miranda’s spirit.
Street art (c) 2013 by Fred Le Chevalier
He approved of physical vigor. One morning just a few weeks ago while waiting for my tea water to simmer, I was inventing Hindu ballet moves. Marley nudged my calf and purred. This is more like it, he said. All that sitting around putting marks on paper. Stretch those limbs! Let’s dance!
Today I found him splayed like a frog on the tile near his litter box. I picked him up and placed him on his throne, a big pillow on the floor near the open window he used to jump out of to sun himself on the fifth-floor ledge.
I called to see how late our vet would be there on a Saturday. Till 3:30. I showered. Tried to reach Richard, who was out photographing a parade.
Marley was having trouble breathing. I kept checking as I dressed. He was panting. I lay beside him, talked to him. Tried to give him water. He couldn’t drink. I ran back to the bedroom to grab my purse. Checked again.
Marley was still.
Deeper than words, silence. And tears.
Marley, death, family in Marley the Cat
Reader Comments (60)
Oh, how sad. But what a life he's had with you. They are so tender and we only have them for a short time. My friend and I are nursing one too and know what an honor it is to be with her until the end. You will have those memories and images always. My love to you both. Carol C
Richard & Kaaren--- Such a gorgeous tribute to a handsome, magnificent cat. He has tales to tell and certainly he is there telling them in that place the great cats go. Sending you my love and condolences-- Carol
Love comes in those increments, those seconds...the measure of his time in love with you both.
I just shed some tears reading of Marley's passing. I have strong memories of our beloved dog Rogue taking her last breath after dropping to our flagstone patio with a thud and whimper. I remember my closest friend Tommy's last breath silencing a hospital room jammed with his wife, eight kids, their families and all the friends he touched with his enormous heart. Tommy prepared me for the last breath our father, Sam took with his five children and dear, sweet wife, Betty of sixty-three years gathered around. I was deeply conflicted with hearing the voices in the room telling him to let go and move on and my thoughts of a miraculous, instantaneous recovery from seven years of deepening dementia and a broken hip. That last breath left such a cold silence in the room and it broke my heart. I have just welled up with tears again thinking of this moment of loss and the emotional changes it brought. Sam has continued to stay with me as my best friend, mentor and insightful father guiding my daily decisions to a more gentle and graceful life. Sam was the barometer of understanding, compassion, enthusiasm, encouragement, stability, joy and love in my life and continues to inspire me to be a far better person than I ever thought I could be. He has been so successful in life and after life in more ways than can be described in words that I just continue to absorb him and live through him every hour of every day.
Dear Kaaren & Richard,
Oh, dear Marley. This is heartbreaking. I loved that boy so, and am so sad to hear of his passing. I'm thinking of all the times we spent together in Playa, and how he loved to sun himself in the courtyard, how he jumped on the kitchen counter and (politely, or sometimes insistently) let me know the tap water should be turned on, just a thin stream so he could maneuver his furry head under there and lap it up. Hearing that meow of greeting walking into your house was always such a warm welcome. {sniff}
Dear Mr. Floofypants. You were a sweet noble soul, and will be so missed. But I see your spirit flying through the cosmos in a bright streak, heading for Leo.
So sorry to hear of this, Kaaren and Richard, and I know it will be difficult to mourn such a wonderful friend. Sending you both big hugs in your grief.
Love,
dawna
Dear friends and family,
We're overwhelmed by the emotional process we're going through, and buoyed by the incredible amount of love that you're sending Marley and us. Thank you.
So much love,
Kaaren and Richard
Oh, dear Kaaren and Richard,
Like so many of your friends I have such fond memories of Marley. The time I spent a few nights at your place in Playa I left the door open and Marley came in and slept with me and I was grateful for his presence. He was a beautiful soul and I'm so glad you got to spend so many years loving each other. Your loss is immense, I know, and it mirrors the enormity of his place in your lives.
Bon voyage, dear Marley, bon voyage.
Hugs and tears for you both.
Love,
Joan
Anna!
How beautiful. We hope Marley and Hotspur are frolicking together right now.
Much love,
Kaaren and Richard
Dear Varya,
Thank you so much. It is astonishing how present he is still. Present yet absent. The greatest mystery.
Much love,
Kaaren and Richard
Jennifer,
Your tears mean everything to us. Isn't it astonishing how completely Marley--(and so many of our animales)---is a distinct individual spirit, as much so as our human beloveds? He had such a good time listening to you shape The Mending Wall. No, he will not be forgotten.
Merci and love,
Kaaren and Richard
Dear Sheyene,
Thank you for honoring Marley with your sympathy. A lovely little lion indeed.
Big hugs back to you.
Kaaren and Richard
Chere Liz,
Marley loved meeting you in Paris, and asked us why we hadn't taken him to one of your poetry readings in L.A. We told him why: because he complained about being in a car as much as a certain other member of our family used to do.
Thank you and love,
Kaaren and Richard
Dear Nina,
I told Marley about seeing you in La Jolla, and a story you told about the realm of mystery. He said, I know, Bastet told me that.
Thank you so much for your empathy. We're glad you have the company of a beloved chat.
Much love,
Kaaren and Richard
Dear Catherine and Tom,
Thank you so much. I am grateful that Marley held on long enough for me to spend more time with him and to say goodbye.
How strange that you'll be in Norway close to the time I'll be there, but just missing you. Drat. We're honored by the invitation.
XO,
Kaaren and Richard
Dear Rita and Jim,
It was such an adventure for Marley to stay with you during your home remodel that we worried that he wouldn't want to come home.
He didn't like working much himself, but he honored it in others, especially when they worked up a sweat. Then you got a good lick.
Thank you for taking such good care of Sir Marley.
Much love,
Kaaren and Richard
Dear Kaaren, What a beautiful tribute to your beloved Marley. I could just feel the cat's frustration with the move to Paris and also the love you shared. I love animals of all kinds. I have never felt richer than when my Springer, Bichon, and Calico all sat on me when I had a broken leg. They were the constant as was Marley for you.
Losing a beloved companion is never easy. I will always remember my animal companions as I know you will Marley.
I can see that "chats" are a big part of Paris art. I was just in Istanbul where the cats are everywhere waiting to be fed. I took food with me everday and fed every cat I saw. I feel you would do the same.
Nina Gustafson sent me the link. I was at Bishop's, but only for 9th and 10 grade and I do remember you.
You are an excellent writer. Thank you.
Carvill
Thank you so much, Nancy. Marvel and mystery: yes! And the fact that he chose us on the night we planned our wedding in Crete, and immediately climbed up on our shoulders and heads as we sat up against pillows on the bed. So very strange, magical.
Thank you for feeling Marley's spirit. He thanks you and so do we. And yes, he does live on.
Much love,
Kaaren
Dear Steve, Sheyene, Truman and Dash,
WE were the lucky ones.
Marley only sat on the laps of people he loved. He had good taste.
We are so moved to hear of Dash's blindness. It feels like such a short time ago that he joined your family as an extremely frisky pup.
Now here is a memorable sentence: "Dachshunds, like all good spirits, are comfortable in the dark."
Sending you love (and rolling bowling balls for Dash),
Kaaren and Richard
Thank you, Connie! Mr. Toes sounds like a Hemingway cat. He was just about the same age as Marley, and also a Los Angeles puss. What a magnificent image, you pregnant with kitten on belly.
When I was a little girl, our cat gave birth to her babies on my tummy in the middle of the night. What a connection to cats that creates.
Two new kitties! What a delight. We will think of Marley and Mr. Toes and Hotspur in the "Land of Brave and Wonderful Cat Souls." Luck indeed.
Much love,
Kaaren and Richard
Dear Joanne,
What a beautiful Marley blessing. He loved play, word play, and I know would appreciate your vision of him in a Chat O fit for a roi. We drove with a kind Parisian woman today to a crematorium outside Paris and saw a road sign, Marley le roi. Yes, it was a sign.
Richard had a hunch he would wait for me to get home before saying goodbye, and yes, he lives on. Thank you.
Much love,
Kaaren and Richard